"Gooooood evening super sports fans, we are glad to see you, glad to be back on the network, and I am particularly glad to introduce you to my new broadcast partner, former roving reporter Fran Queenie."
"Thanks, Rob, it's a dream come true hosting this show with you. Not such a dream come true having to do it from this floating tin can of potential death, now with several thousands of gallons of water added."
"Some people may wonder where JayC is, some people may think this is some kind of affirmative action hiring or some kind of inappropriate touching dismissal, but those people need to just forget all the speculation and rumor and focus on the action we are bringing you from the BADGE space station."
"Aquatic league wars Rob, what's the scoop?"
"Not gonna lie Fran I think Nova thought that a floating deathtrap miles above the earth needed the added potential death by drowning."
"Well the first round was certainly fraught with excitement and danger, I don't think we really need to add anything more to the mix."
"Let's have a look at the results ..."
"Well D1 saw three fifths and WMD in the mix, Psycho Squad took on the big dogs of D1 and took an absolute beating."
"Looks like Skel told the troops to go hard after he dropped that loss to Zanazola,"
"I think they may have rallied around after that."
"Omniversal and Galactic in the other match saw the Traffic Cops take a fairly easy looking win."
"D2 Av51 cruised past Angels Of Sorcery and Villains Inc seemed untroubled by Into the Darkness."
"Think we could see an interesting final in this group, and the bookies' odds on round 2 support the popular opinion."
"D3 saw another AV51 round 1 win with the ever plucky Legacy of Spawn getting an important first win in a close match against Seraphim Angels."
"D4 The Claymores Stewarts and Fifths Kung Fu Hustle are just cannon fodder to the two AV51 teams, looking at the lineups of both the AV51 squads I can't see anyone taking a knee and predict a tough fight for the gold."
"D5 is where we jump to 8 teams ... wins for AV51, Creatures of the Night, the Mercs, and Fifths Darkside."
"D6 AV51 cruised, L&D had a close match with Star Force, Times Arrow took down Fifth Code Blue and Pain shut out Freaks of Nature."
"D7 Stacked Deck and Magnificent 7 picked up comfortable wins, NobleGates shut out 777 and Fifths Mortal Kombat won the fourth match up."
"D8 Saw Villains Inc's mini team walk over Firefly Fun Haus, Mojo's Dojo grabbed two wins for every one gained by Claymores Thunderforce, SUffering kept a distance from the Infected, and AV51 got the second shut out of the round."
"D9 Saw Loon Platoon, Claymores MacGregors and Star Force Juniors take wins. While LUSH needed extra time to see off the Purple Onion."
"D10 ... yes we have a D10 for the first time ... ah who cares ... we had a total of 69 points scored across all 4 matches and that's about the best thing I can tell you about the division."
"So we had the first OT of League Wars 9, The Onion took an early lead, Lush fought back, with a matter of minutes left on the clock the Onion pulled it back square. The extra eight hours were added and LUSH just ground out the win. We spoke to Dame Echidna after the final buzzer eventually sounded."
"First OT of the wars, 8 hours extra time, not the level of effort we expect to see from the Onion! How do you feel Dame?"
"The Onion likes to come, especially in the last minute."
"But you couldn't get the win?"
"I think we were thoroughly spent after the normal time ended, we just couldn't keep it up for an entire 32 hours straight."
" I understand that Zen from AV51 has asked for a stewards inquiry... and I quote 'Purple Onion coming back to tie it in the last minute, Very un-onion behavior. You can bet there'll be an investigation.' What do you have to say about that?"
"Zen can raise his concerns, and maybe he has a point, but my main concern is that LUSH was exposed to Blue Waffle for 32 hours, and that's probably something nobody needs."
"Good luck in round two Dame."
"There's a second round? We have to fight again? Oh ... "
"Dame Echidna from the Onion there. We will try to speak to Zen in regards to his allegations, and Im sure Nova will have something to say, we'll let you know if there are any further developments."
"Round 2 is only a few hours away, and we will, as always, bring you all the best of the action."
"It's all sports, all super, all the time!"
"I'm not sure you should really use that line, Fran ..."
"Whatever Rob ... how's about ... You want your sports report super you know where to find it ... SAS!"
"I think you can use the line Fran ... and now a word from our sponsors ...."
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