Chaz: Welcome to the first Faction Wars for BADGE. The stadium has never been this full. Of course since the World Corps has forced all the heroes to evac the world, the station and arena are always full...but that's another problem. Today, we're going to have some fun and hopefully the spectators at home will have fun with us.
EB: I love all the excitement for this event. I was down at the field, talking to the heroes earlier and you know what, they have some pretty strange names.
Chaz: Yeah, some are clear and concise, but some are...well...unusual.
EB: Truthfully, this first team up, I can't remember their names and I need to know them. Do you know them, Chaz buddy?
Chaz: Of course. I'm a reporter, I have to know all the heroes names.
EB: Well you know I've never met these heroes. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's playing on the team.
Chaz: Well, let's see, Some Unknown Hero's up first, A Strange Guy's fighting second, I've Got Questions About Who's going third...
EB: That's what I want to find out.
Chaz: I just said Some Unknown Hero's up first, a Complete Stranger's fighting second, I've Got Questions About Who's third.
EB: You are the ace reporter?
Chaz: Yes.
EB: And you don't know the heroes names?
Chaz: Of course I do.
EB: Well then who's up first?
Chaz: Some Unknown Hero.
EB: You're telling me some unknown hero is first on the field.
Chaz: Yes.
EB: But what's his name?
Chaz: Who's name..
EB: The first hero.
Chaz: Some Unknown Hero.
EB: The first guy entering the arena is...
Chaz: Some Unknown Hero!
EB: I'm asking YOU who we're going to see take the field first?
Chaz: I just told you.
EB: You told me some unknown hero is in the first round?
Chaz: Yes.
EB: Well go ahead and tell me their name.
Chaz: How many times do I need to tell you?
EB: Just once. I want to cheer for someone, not just some unknown hero?
Chaz: Cheer for whoever you want to..
(EB's left eye and right ear twitch)
EB: Look, you gotta first match up?
Chaz: Certainly.
EB: Who's fighting first?
Chaz: Some Unknown Hero is fighting That Guy?
EB: When you contact the first competitors with messages, who gets them?
Chaz: How should I know? I'm not either of their agents.
EB: All I'm trying to find out is the fellow's name fighting in the first match.
Chaz: Which one? Some Unknown Hero? That Guy?
EB: Who is fighting first!
Chaz: Either one of them.
EB: Who gets the messages from you...
Chaz: I don't know, but when I message them, they both respond. Sometimes it's one of their wives instead.
EB: Who's wife?
Chaz: It could be either one of theirs, depending on who I message.
(EB gnaws on the table in front of him for a moment.)
Chaz: What's wrong?
EB: Look, all I wanna know is when you sign up the first competitor for Faction Wars, how does he sign his name?
Chaz: Some Unknown Hero or That Guy?
EB: The guy.
Chaz: That Guy. Why are you having such a hard time with this?
EB: How does he sign...
Chaz: Most likely with a pen.
EB: Who?
Chaz: That Guy.
(EB's right foot quickly taps the chair he is standing in as he glares at Chaz.)
EB: All I'm trying to find out is the names of the two guys fighting first. I don't be seen rooting for a complete stranger.
Chaz: No. Some Unknown Hero and That Guy are both fighting first. A Complete Stranger is fighting in the second match.
EB: I'm not asking you who's in the second match. I want to know who will be in the first match
Chaz: Some Unknown Hero's fighting, you know, That Guy.
EB: One hero at a time!
Chaz: Well, don't change the roster around.
EB: I'm not changing nobody!
Chaz: Take it easy, EB.
EB: I'm only asking you, who's that guy up against in the first fight?
Chaz: Like I said, Some Unknown Hero.
EB: Ok.
Chaz: All right.
(EB mutters words he shouldn't say about Chaz., then points at the battlefield.)
EB: That guy's first to fight? The one I'm pointing at, right?
Chaz: No. That's Some Unknown Hero.
EB: That guy! I want to know about that guy.
Chaz: Then why are your pointing at Some Unknown Hero.
EB: You're making me angry.
Chaz: He's fighting third match, we're not talking about him.
EB: Now how did I get on the third round?
Chaz: You mentioned his name.
EB: If I mentioned the third competitors name, who did I say is fighting third?
Chaz: You're Making Me Angry.
EB: I'm making you angry?
Chaz: No, not really.
EB: Good. Let's get this figured out before you make me hoppin' mad. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
Chaz: He's up fourth.
EB: What?! Can we get back to the third round again, please. I'm not trying to make you angry. I just need your help to understand.
Chaz: You're Making Me Angry in the third round and I'm telling you You Wouldn't like Me when I'm Angry in the fourth.
(EB materializes an exploding egg, seriously ready to throw it.)
EB: Would you just stay on third round and don't go off it.
Chaz: All right, what do you want to know?
EB: Now who's fighting third round? I want to know about some unknown hero so I can cheer for them.
Chaz: Why do you insist on putting Some Unknown Hero in third round?
EB: What am I putting in the third round?
Chaz: Not what. Who. Some Unknown Hero.
EB: I don't want to talk about some unknown hero. I want to talk about that guy?
Chaz: They are both up in the first.
EB: You're making me angry.
Chaz & EB Together: Third round!
(EB threatens Chaz with that exploding egg.)
EB: Look, you gotta fourth round competitor?
Chaz: Sure.
EB: Tell me the fourth heroes name?
Chaz: I told you. You Wouldn't like Me when I'm Angry.
EB: Don't get huffy. I just thought I'd ask you.
Chaz: Well, I just thought I'd tell ya.
EB: Then tell me about that guy in the fourth round.
Chaz: That Guy's fighting first.
EB: Stay out of the first round! I want to know about a complete stranger's name in fourth round?
Chaz: No, A Complete Stranger is up second.
EB: I'm not asking you about some unknown hero that's in the second match.
Chaz: He's in the first!
EB: You're making me angry...
Chaz & EB Together: Third round!
EB: The fourth round competitors name?
Chaz: That's the Question.
EB: Huh!
Chaz: Oh, he's fighting in the fifth round.
EB: Oh, this is making my head hurt. I'm through. I need an aspirin!
Chaz: What?
EB: I said I need an aspirin!
Chaz: Oh, she's in the sixth round...
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