League Wars: Haunted Heroes - Round Two Wrap Up

By Chaz Hamilton

I have to speak quietly for this, so please bear with me. Things are getting really freaking frightening up here on the BADGE orbital station, but I won't let that interfere with my journalistic duty. 

If I do happen to die up here, Mom and Dad, I love you.

Round Two was the proverbial middle child of the league war. Round One got all the attention because of the first ever DOUBLE OVERTIME. Round three will be remembered for those leagues who capture the gold. Round two can't help but to be the one that fights to catch any attention it can get, the crumbs left by its older, more robust sibling and the younger, cuter member of the bunch. Maybe one day we will just call the battle rounds Marcia, Jan, and Cindy. Like hurricanes.

The excitement unfolded right at the top this go around, so we will start our analysis in Division One.

Division One:

Is there any surprise that WMD - Black Order has gone a second round undefeated? I've been getting some messages from Midgardsormr indicating he has something to say about the WMD - Black Order's goals, so please stay tuned for further information on that topic. As much as I may have a professional rivalry with Krystal Fae at the Sentinel, I didn't enjoy seeing her getting bashed about. Well, I didn't enjoy it much. 

As for NMDS vs Agents of Sorcery, the overtime didn't go on a long, but it did end in a very, very narrow victory for the Angels of Sorcery. League-member POKEURMOM had this to say about the bout.

"Good fight NMDS, but Kid Chaos came through with less than 5 minutes remaining to give us the win! Well fought!" - POKEURMOM

The predictions for Round 3 are far from certain, but unless NMDS eats every box of Wheaties on the planet below, <gulp>,  I think it is fair to see WMD - Black Order taking the gold prize.

I will need to ask one of the members of the Horsemen if an undefeated win by WMD - Black Order is one of the signs of an apocalypse? Maybe I could ask Slayer B.A.S.? She has had experience preventing those kinds of events, but with her being down in Division 6, I don't know if she could save us from this approaching doom.

Division Two:

With the intentional demotion of the Avengers to Division Two, they continue to wallop on the 5th Precinct organization, specifically the 5th Precinct: Psycho Squad. Next round, they will challenge The Colony 51, the winners against the 5th Precinct Galactic. It should be noted that Chromatic Death of the Avengers has already extended the hand of respect to their opponents in the online forums.

"Just wanted to congratulate Colony for making the finals in D2! You guys have a great team. We're gonna do our best, and hopefully come out on top. Good luck folks!!" - Chromatic Death

Personally, I don't know how he got over there. Last I saw him, he and I were wandering the halls of the BADGE orbital station. He refused to shake MY hand and give an interview after we picked him up in Italy, but I'll have to chalk it up to not being able to match the charm of Zen, the penguin.

Round three will see Avengers vs the Colony for gold and the 5th Precinct organization fighting for a bronze like a family around the dinner table at Thanksgiving over the last roll.

"I get the last King's Hawaiian."

"No, it's mine. Hands off..."

Division Three:

Based on their name, the Avenger team in this round is targeting the Horsemen. I guess without a 5th Precinct team to have a grudge against, the Avengers must have rolled dice to see who to rage against.

Division Four:

Here in Division Four, we see another triumphant Avengers team, but don't ask me about what a lemon law is. The Avengers will advance against the Baptized Blood Warriors next round while the RG-Creatures of the Night will try to feast on the 5th Precinct: Kung Fu Hustle in a struggle for the bronze.

Division Five:

The 5th Precinct organization picks up two wins and one loss in the Division Five arena. 5th Precinct: Instigators and Psycho Squad: Injustice League advance as they defeat the 1st Spacemarine Battalion and Justice Knights, respectively. Red Guard keeps the 5th's Code Blue league from advancing with the rest of the organization. 

Oh, and don't forget another Avenger's group, Drop the D, taking a bit of bounce out of Tygger's Freak Show's efforts.

Division Six:

Stealth 51 goes undefeated against the first Ghost Warrior entry in Division Six, but PAIN (a GW affiliate) brings it as they smite the second NMDS group. The "Chosen" GW league keeps the plain GW team down while the 5th Precinct: Wise Guys keep the Star Force grounded.

Division Seven: 

Last night I reported a bit on the Division Six matches. Suicide Squad defeats the Shield, putting the Suicide Squad in the fight for gold, along with Dark Guins 51 who identified the 5th Precinct Undercover and found them wanting. The 5th Precinct Undercover and the Mojo's Dojo, who were the superstars of Round One will now be fighting others for silver. And in the last Division Six spot for round two, two 5th Precinct teams danced, but in the end, the Buddy Cops lead.

Division Eight:

What was that?

I'll tell you all, I better wrap this up. Who is it that said "I've got a bad feeling about this." while traveling in space?

 Me. That's who. My therapist is going to have a full calendar when I get back down from this space-bound deathtrap. 

The Brotherhood causes SUFFERING to suffer a loss. The Purple Onion makes S7 cry, and the Ghost Warriors ARMY OF ANGEL does to 5th Precinct: Space Force what the 5th Precinct: Wise Guys did to The Star Force. It's true, people, bad stuff travels downhill. Finally, the Rider$ of the Storm trample the 777 league. I suppose it wasn't their lucky number that day.

Round Three is only hours away. Good luck to all participants. If you don't hear from me tomorrow, try breaking out your Ouija boards and give me a call. 

Who are you? Where is everyone one else? No...no... NOOOOOO!!!!

<signal ended...>